If any of you have watched the Beyonce, Tyra Banks & Demi Moore videos, you will notice that while they all look attractive in their own way, they are not alike. In other words they are more totally authentic to their genetic potential. But if Demi Moore tries to have Tyra Banks’ body or Tyra Banks tries to have Beyonce’s body or Beyonce tries to have Demi Moore’s body they will inevitably fail. So when one has a fixed idea of perfection based on some external influence, that fixed idea is not rooted in reality and therefore bound to cause misery.
The universe creates unique people not Xerox copies. So when one is not respecting and loving the individuality of the person or worst still your own individuality, it is a sure recipe for disaster. This is because respecting your individuality is the only respect you need.
If you move towards being a totally authentic individual you will naturally love yourself more because the whole process becomes more effortless with time.
If you move towards being a more perfect individual based on some externally fixed idea, which is not you, you will naturally hate yourself more. This is because the whole process becomes more and more of an effort with time.
Even worse if you try to mold someone into your idea of perfection, than you make both your lives a misery. This is because there are only unique individuals and no perfect individuals. Happiness is learning to drop the mask society has thought you to wear (in the silly idea of trying to be perfect) and becoming more totally authentic to your uniqueness.
Aim to achieve totality and not perfection. People should authentically and totally love their individuality. In other words, totally love their unique body, mind, heart and soul. When you move in this direction, you will automatically want to take care of your body, mind, heart and soul.
Unfortunately, most of us are aiming for some external idea of perfection and therefore condemn others and ourselves in the process. When the journey starts with condemnation, love goes out the window. We struggle to take care of our body, mind, heart and soul.